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Wednesday, 8 June 2011


“Do not be deceived, evil communication corrupts good manners.
                                                                                                        1 Corinthians 15:33

Psychology defines association as the connection between two events that results in learning. This means man who is by default associated to something, will eventually learn from it. Association is a natural phenomenon that begins without anybody’s involvement. Man is associated to the spirit, physical and the synthetics of this world. We are admonished by our parents, to choose the right friends because of the influence peers have over each other through relationship.
Everyone who belongs to any association adheres to the rules and regulations of that union. You can’t be a member from a distance. A typical example is that of real supporters of any major football team. You don’t support by word of mouth but through paying membership dues and being present at football matches. Association is everything in our world. Even though vision is given individually, its pursuit and subsequent achievement stems from the people we relate to. The book of Proverbs is full of what association can do to an individual.
Association denotes character and success. You cannot align yourself to fools and expect to be great. There are two types of association I believe that we all sometimes find ourselves in- negative and positive associations. David had the privilege of being associated to Nathan the Prophet, and was guided on the issues of the nation. The bible records how ordinary men and women became great under the leadership of David. David escaped from Saul only to be the champion of all kinds of people. In his troubles, people who were in distress, debt and discontented joined to make him captain over their lives. At some point they were called the Mighty men of David in the book of Chronicles.
Can you imagine if Saul had not chased David? All these would-be great men will never have become what the Lord had intended them to be. To me this is one of the greatest success story every written or told. Their greatness was in their alignment to David. Am not sure how you see this story, but I believe it should push you to question who you associate with. These men had a positive association and were never the same. Do the people you align yourself to have what it takes to help your gifts, talents, skills and abilities? If not then I guess you are in the right wrong company.
Judas walked with Jesus during His three years ministry and never achieved anything because of his negative attitude towards association. He was part of the twelve hand picked by Jesus but never understood the concept thereof. He never overcome his desire for filthy lucre which subsequently led to his betray of Jesus. Most believers behave similar to what Judas did. They only want the miracle but not the relationship. What they easily forget is that it is the relationship that sustains the miracle. Judas had a negative association with Jesus.
Many are searching for the right place, person or purpose to pursue. However one might define it, your relationship will determine how far you get in life.  The reason why many are dissatisfied and move from one place to another is because of the associations they have. Out of the many there could be one that deserves your investment of time, money and also attention. 
Remember whatever you are related to, by Psychological terms, you will learn from it. By so doing you add value to your life. You cannot desire the best when you are connected to the worst in thought, action and also in environment. Your life could be better if you can make that shift once and for all. Fear will keep you bound if you don’t break from toxic relationships. 
After all you can’t force friendship. Associations are built based on integrity and values. Whenever any group in an association become obsessed with only benefitting and not adding value, the purpose loses its significance. I trust it is time for you to re-evaluate the associations you find yourself in and become convinced either to leave or to stay and enhance its significance in your life.


  1. Powerful massege man of God. we must re-evaluate our associates. thank you.

  2. Mr Sihle, we all need at some point to evaluate our associations. Often times we can become so used to a particular association so much so that we loose sight of the good or destructive pattern we might have gotten ourselves into. We thank God for constantly prompting us to make the change where necessary.


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